


Fluff, Cookies, and Clint Getting Punched in the Face.

by ReineFandoms



Category: The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: AKA Clint gets punched and Toni hurts her hand, Alternate Universe - Gender Changes, Complete, F/F, Fem!Tony Stark - Freeform, Fluff, Fluff Fic, Fluff and Crack, Minor Injuries, Minor Violence, Natasha is a bro, So is Bruce, crackfic, fem!steve rogers - Freeform, how does one tag?, unrelenting fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-23
Updated: 2018-10-23
Packaged: 2019-08-06 06:58:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,031
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16383482
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ReineFandoms/pseuds/ReineFandoms
Summary: It's just unrelenting fluff and crack with a minor addition of Clint getting punched because he forgot the rule of jumping out of air vents and scaring people.Toni has multiple ovens because she’s Extra™️I don’t own these characters they belong to Marvle and Disney.





	Fluff, Cookies, and Clint Getting Punched in the Face.

**Author's Note:**

> There is fluff, cookies, and Clint getting punched in the face because he needs to learn to not jump out of vents and scare people. Avengers Age Of Ultron? What’s that? Captain America Civil War? Never heard of it. Must be a completely different universe. Bucky is safe. Let’s assume that he came to Toni when hiding from HYDRA and Stephanie. Toni knows about her parents b/c Steph told her when the files dropped.  
> Toni and Steph are girlfriends. Natasha is a godsend because she saves Clint. Clint is a moron. Bucky knows how to wrap fractured thumbs and bake. Bruce is done. Thor is sneaky. Pepper is terrifying. Happy is done. Rhodey is a thief.  
> Because Toni is extra they have five ovens that can all fit four cookie sheets.

If anyone asked, Toni would deny that she was giggling like a loon while sitting on top of Captain America’s shoulders. In fact, as far as anyone knew, she was cursing Stephanie’s bloodline all the way back to the dark ages.

Yes.

That was what was happening.

Bloodline cursing was definitely going on at the moment.

Totally.

Yup.

Okay so she was sitting on Cap’s shoulders and giggling like a Harley Quinn reject. 

(Yes she knew she was an actual “super” but hey, Suicide Squad looked interesting and Rhodey had an unhealthy obsession with the Joker.)

“How’s the view from up there?”, Steph’s laugh infused voice called up to her as she continued to walk around the living room, straightening some things from last nights movie night.

“Well I’ve never seen a pair of more perfect hills”, Toni said cheekily as she leaned over her girlfriend’s shoulders and rested her chin on the blonde’s head.

“Oh my gosh Toni!”, Steph laughed, “That’s so not appropriate!”

“Oh come on it’s the truth!”, Toni defended herself while she sat up and continued laughing.

“You know what? I don’t think you deserve the cookies I was gonna bake”, Steph said as she walked over to the huge couch that was the centerpiece of the comunal living-room. She plopped down suddenly which dislodged Toni from her shoulders.

Toni didn’t go down quietly though. Not in the slightest. She squawked in a way that, if she did it again, would probably destroy her vocal chords and with her feet directly in Steph’s face.

“Ugh Toni please get your feet out of my face”, the blonde complained as she tried to push said feet away.

Toni smirked before saying, “Sorry. No can-do, no cookies no feet out of the face Cap. Common law.”

Stephanie groaned and swatted at the brunette’s feet again, “Come on Tony don’t be like that.”

“Make sure I get cookies and I won’t be like this. Except, well, every other day the week”, Toni cackled.

“Or I could have JARVIS call Pepper”, Steph threatened.

“You wouldn’t”, the genius gasped, a touch of true fear in her voice.

“You know I would Toni”, Steph taunted again.

“But I’m injured!”, Toni hollered while she moved her feet from the other woman’s face.

“You have two bandaids, Toni. You’re not going to die by from not eating a few cookies”, Steph said as she stood and stretch before leaning down and pecking Toni on the lips and heading for the communal kitchen.

“Nooo! Come back! Steph don’t leave me alone!”, Toni yelled at the retreating blondes back.

“You obviously have feet. Use them”, was all she heard as the sound of metal bowls hitting granite filled the room.

Toni groaned and laid back on the couch with her arm over her eyes before giving into the inevitable. She sat up, swung her legs over the end of the couch, and walked towards the kitchen.

Which was when Clint dropped out of an overhead vent and landed in front of her. 

Only, at first she hadn’t known it was Clint, and she may or may not’ve punched him square in the face.

She definitely punched him. 

And in true *sigh* Clint Barton fashion, he screamed like he was being mauled by a lion. Which sent Steph sprinting into the living room and nearly wiping said archer out.

Steph rushed back to Clint from where she’d dodged away and began to pull his hands from his face. She saw a flash of red coming from his nose and then she noticed Toni clutching her hand to her chest and looking like she was about to rip Clint a new one. This was when she decided to change tactics.

“JARVIS call Natasha and tell her that she needs to evac Clint before he’s murdered and tell Bruce to prep the med lab for a possible broken noes and fractured finger”, the captain rattled off quickly as she stood between the bleeding archer and the furious genius.

“Of course Captain, I have also taken the liberty of temporary locking down all of the armors”, the AI responded.

Toni was practically shaking with anger and repressing the adrenaline coursing through her veins. Steph was certain that Clint having only gotten a possibly broken noes was probably a blessing from Thor.

“Thanks”, was all she had time to say before Toni began to stalk over to Clint who was stupidly trying to stem the flow of blood from his noes instead of fleeing.

Just as Steph was beginning to think that she’d have to physically restrain the brunette Natasha came in. The redhead took one look at both the genius and the archer before cuffing Clint across the back of his head and leading him from the room. 

“I swear to Odin! When I get my hands on him he’s going to regret ever leaving those Carnies!”, Toni snarled under her breath.

“I think he already does doll”, Steph said whilst trying to hold back the laughter that threatened to spill, “I think you might’ve broken his noes. Here let me check your hand.”

“It’s fine, I just had my thumb tucked. He shocked me and I reacted. Didn’t think to untuck it till I already punched him”, Toni huffed as she pulled her hand from her chest and held it out for Stephanie to check over.

“I don’t think it’s broken. JARVIS can you scan Toni’s hand real quick?”, Steph asked as she looked towards the ceiling.

“Of course Captain”, there was a small pause as JARVIS scanned the brunette’s hand, “Ma’am has sustained a minor fracture to her right thumb which, if splinted, should heal within four weeks. If not splinted, it should heal within six.”

“Thanks J”, Toni sighed. She then turned and burrowed her face into Stephanie’s shoulder and sighed.

“What happened here?”, a voice called out. 

Toni didn’t say anything and Stephanie shook her head and said, “Well Buck, Clint happened”, which was really all that needed to be said.

“Ah. Yeah I can imagine that. But what happened to your dame Steph?”, the voice that had been identified as Bucky’s said as the sound of footsteps came closer to where the couple stood.

“Tone fractured her thumb punching him in the face”, Steph said while she began to card her fingers through the brown hair.

“Again I can see that. Here Toni, let me see your hand”, Bucky said while he pulled his hair back into a quick roll bun™️.

The genius groaned before pulling her hand, that had been tucked into her stomach, out and resting her forearm across Stephanie’s shoulder so Bucky could look at it.

“I can splint and wrap this if you don’t feel like going to see Bruce”, Bucky said after a few seconds.

“Please do. I don’t feel like fracturing my other thumb punching Clint in the face again”, Toni answered.

“Alright”, the man chuckled before going to the shockingly large med-kit that was in almost every common room in the tower.

Not much time had passed before Toni had a fully splinted hand and Bucky was helping Stephanie prepare the homemade batter for the cookies. 

“Sergeant Barnes”, JARVIS said, interrupting the calm atmosphere, “Miss. Potts has requested that you go to the main lobby to travel to your suit fitting for the next charity event.”

“Shit, that’s today? Tell her I’ll be right there”, Bucky said as he rushed to wash his hands, “Save me some cookies.”

“You got it Buck”, Steph answered before grabbing the bowl Toni handed her and then sat it on the counter behind her. She turned back and pulled Toni to her feet from where she’d been preparing the batter for the tiramisu eclairs. 

“Is the batter done?”, Toni asked as she took the water bottle that Steph had picked up and handed to her.

“Yup. Buck finished the last bit of it before JARVIS called him”, she said while she rinsed the last of the flour from her hands.

“I expect so many of these cookies to be saved for me”, Bruce said as he entered the kitchen and opened a cabinet to start a pot of tea for himself.

“What for”, Toni jokingly demanded.

“For dealing with a whining Clint Barton”, the man answered promptly.

“Fair”, both Toni and Steph said at once before looking at one another and laughing.

Bruce glanced at the couple and smiled before going back to his brewing tea. 

Meanwhile Toni went to the fridge and tossed a bottle of apple juice at Steph and grabbed the last of the gallon of milk that she knew Bruce would want for his tea. Bruce thanked her and walked out throwing the jug away as he passed the trash chute.

“Want to go watch a corny Hallmark Christmas movie while we wait for the eclair batter to rise”, Steph asked while brushing her short hair back from her face.

“Sure”, Toni answered as she turned to the door that lead to the living room.

As the couple left, Thor stuck his head through the door that lead to the kitchen from the hallway. Then he looked back into the hallway, said something, and began walking bare footed into the kitchen followed by an equally barefoot Rhodey. 

Together the men grabbed two of the eighteen pans with raw cookie dough and began to dry to sneak out when Toni and Steph both rushed into the kitchen.

Giving up on stealth the two male Avengers sprinted out of the room and initiated lockdown on Rhodey’s old guest room. 

“Damn those idiots!”, Toni shouted before turning on her heel and marching back to the kitchen, “You made extra dough right?”

“Yeah”, Steph answered as she went and pulled a half full bowl from the refrigerator.

“You’re brilliant”, Toni exclaimed as she pulled out two of the unused trays.

They’d used almost all of the dough when they ran out of room on the trays. That was also when Happy walked in. 

“Pepper wants some raw cookie dough and she said that if there wasn’t some in her fridge by the time she gets back with Barnes then she is going to take all of the cookies for herself”, Happy said, sounding exasperated. 

Steph just handed the man the last of the cookie dough in the bowl and he nodded his thanks before walking off.

“That was eventful”, Toni commented dryly as she began putting the, now twenty, cookie dough covered pans into the ovens.

“Yup”, was all that Steph said as she put the eclair in the nearest oven and then went over to help her girlfriend with the cookies.

After about fifteen minutes the couple pulled all of the batches out of the oven slipping the nineteenth and twentieth pans into the oven that also held the eclair. 

“So how long does the eclair need to bake Toni?”, Steph asked as she closed the oven door.

“Mom always put it in for two hours and fifteen minutes so by the time we pull those last two batches out there will be an hour and forty-five minutes left”, Toni answered simply while she used a spatula to move the cookies to the cooling rack.

“Cool”, Steph said as she snagged a cookie and bit into it.

Toni grabbed a rack of mostly cooled cookies and walked over to her girlfriend, “Natasha said that she’d be up soon so she can get some of these babies. I think we can trust her to not burn down the tower. Wanna give me a ride to our room so we can eat these in peace while watching corny Hallmark movies?”

“You know I do”, Steph laughed as she got on one knee so Toni could climb onto her shoulders.

Once situated Toni let go of the cookies with one hand and pointed in the vague direction of their room, “Tally ho!!”

Once the couple had left, Clint jumped down from the vent above the kitchen island and smirked before grabbing a few cookies for himself and climbing back into his ‘nest’. This proving that once again, Clint Barton would never be deterred from cookies.

**Author's Note:**

> This was originally posted on my Tumblr (reinefandoms) under “First Fic” or something of the like. This is my first fic and it has been only minorly edited since I wrote it so please be kind. Some of it might not make sense (likely) but I hope you like it! Comments and Kudos are appreciated and if your going to give criticism make sure it’s constructive!


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